Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Doing research

I hadn't blogged in a while because frankly, I'm still researching surrogacy. It seems like a very overwhelming search for both Intended Parents and surrogates. I mean, just browsing at IP's classified ads makes me realize that picking a couple would be extremely difficult!

Then there's the fact that I would be a 1st time surrogate, so I feel I need to do my homework. Doing it through an agency would be SO much easier, but unfortunately there are none here in PR, and the ones I've found on the net require that the surrogate live in the continental USA.

We wanted to relocate to Louisiana, but a job my husband got there wasn't going to well, so he returned back home. Nonetheless, I believe it all happened for a reason. While my hubby was in LA, I replied (for the first and only time) to an Intended Mother's classified ad, and now I have her as a friend at Myspace (May 27, 2015 UPDATE: She is still my friend at Facebook! Hey Megan!). I am not going to be her surrogate, but am looking forward to learning from her own journey as an Intended Mother going through an Independent Traditional Surrogacy.

So now I'm reading a lot about what everyone calls going "indy", and WOW! I get anxious just reading about it! I mean, do Intended Parents know that at least "I" ask myself many of the same things they ask themselves about surrogate mothers? Like:

- Are these IP's of sound mind? What I mean is, are they mentally stable.
- Are they drug or alcohol users?
- Are their intentions good?
- Are they good people?
- Do they have a criminal background?
- Are they sexual offenders?
- Does either one abuse their spouse in any way?

So many questions. All I know of agencies is what I've seen on the internet as I've started to research surrogacy, but it all does sound more "secure" at an agency. And I'm not referring to the surrogates mother's fee being secure. What I'm referring to is that everyone involved seems to be more scrutinized. And that can't be that bad, right? If anyone reading has been, or knows of someone who has/is going through a surrogacy agreement through an agency, please give me your opinions or views. I would really appreciate it.

I know that it's more costly for the Intended Parents. And that also raised a few questions for me. One of them being: Who can afford this?! I think if I was the IP, I'd have to try going independent (Indy) as well! :)

Anyway, I guess I'm just writing away my questions and will continue to do more reading. I've been doing on and off research since my toddler was about 1 year, and now he's 3, so I guess I've been doing a lot of reading right?! LOL! :P

I guess I'll finish off by wishing good luck to anyone reading!

~ Vicky ~

Latina residing in PR for 33 yrs now
Oldest of 3 sisters
Mommy of 3 boys
Wife for 15 yrs

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